The answer is, it can vary based upon how long you are willing to listen to others and how much you want to speak. How much do you listen?
“Listen at full volume. Don’t listen for two seconds or two minutes, or two minutes, five minutes, or one hour,” says Haggard. “This can be quite an intimidating task for people who are used to it being easier to talk at full volume than to say nothing. Your heart beats, you exhale, you blink, and you go on. Try to be a little more relaxed and allow yourself to go without worrying that the next line is going to be ‘How long does it take before the voice can change?’ At this point you’ll have an idea of when you can expect the change, and you’ll be able to begin the long, difficult process of listening without becoming anxious.”
Haggard adds that in order to speak effectively, you do need to be able to listen at the same loud volume it is natural to use when you’re relaxed. You can take part in your own voice-changing experiment by finding a quiet place so that you can listen without worrying you’re breaking the rule or not able to listen for more than one second or two minutes.
A lot has to do with breathing patterns. You breathe shallowly, as though you are talking about something important to get across, says Haggard. Then you say a line or two and your voice will take on the same quality and you will begin to use the same inflection when you reach the end of the sentence or say you’re leaving.
If you have a lot of difficulty concentrating, try breathing at a normal pace, notes Haggard. You may learn to breathe at a comfortable rate by counting your breath as you inhale, then exhaling. “Breathe in slowly and allow your body to get comfortable before continuing,” adds Haggard. To use this technique, find a quiet position — with a chair, a table or a desk — and practice breathing in slowly as you inhale. Then try to exhale quickly and count and do this while you speak.
As you use the technique, keep your voice low in order to avoid the habit of having people yell out when you begin using your voice. The most effective exercises for helping you to breathe at the right pace can be found on the website of the National Institute of Standards and Technology, and include a section on speaking in the voice. Haggard advises you
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